Daily Decision

I had this website once broken into blog categories, and the one that was read the most was the raw and real content: Total Transparency. I kept getting rejected for positions because conservative-minded folks were coming on the site and shrouding themselves in judgment.

I became poised and polished acting more professional. As I played the part, I even stopped cursing-still nothing.

I am NOT a yes (wo)MAN and never will be. I will continue to push the envelope and continue to give myself paper cuts. I am not giving up by any means. I am not a corporate croney and do not want to be stifled for the remainder of my life. I cannot put on an act. No one knows how much I have been doing, how hard I have been working, and all the behind-the-scenes shit I am up to.

Bookmark this page if you want the real me. I will give credit when its due and will call people and companies out on their shit. I am done being someone who I am not. It drains me.

I keep stating if something does not yield results, I do not exert energy into it. Notice social media truancy? I constantly pivot strategies as I observe behaviors. I always have a Plan A, B, C, and D. I will be moving tabs around because some of this content on my site even bores me. I had written 7 books in 6 months. Notice how only 3 are published? That is because Scamazon WILL NOT GET ANY MORE OF MY CONTENT.

Until then, I am just going to be out here in the wilderness known as the Internet. I leave you with this. I designed it, but who am I?


Real Rejection

Today, someone went out of their way to reject me and I am honestly flattered. Apparently, I had something on LinkedIn I had written months ago. I just made my resume more professional. Obviously, the book is not paying my bills and neither is this online selling. Even though I rock at both. I updated my resume and it is not in black and white because that is too sterile.

With the New Year, here are some of my accomplishments in six months. I cannot list them all because now is not the right time.

I need to look at this to know everything I do is not in vane.

  • In four months, became Google Verified

  • Wrote, edited, formatted, designed, and published three books in approximately five months

  • Wrote 7 books in total but cannot publish the rest with a deceptive company. Only paperbacks are offered

  • E-commerce Integration, Marketing, and Targeting

  • Got the attention of some highly prolific companies

  • My audience growth is organic and unpaid

  • Reached 54 countries in six months with site

  • In six months, became an eBay top-rated seller-I even have that gold badge. I am not accepting returns so I hit my peak and will not make it to the plus level.

  • In one week on Mercari, had over 30 sales-all five-star ratings

  • Product descriptions really do sell things and I am detailed with humor

Put it in the Past

I deleted 300 pictures from my phone and am going to continue deleting because I am not sure why I held onto so many pictures. The past is the past and I have no place for it. I have the journals that will be made into books so there is no need for pictures. Pictures are nice to have to go down memory lane, but I will get those printed and place them in a box.

I honestly do not want to reflect upon many of these places, peoples, or situations. I am keeping pictures of my dogs and great trips I had. I am going to be managing my time better as I cut social media usage since it draws me less than 1% of traffic.

All of the platforms, work, and time are not yielding results. For some, social media works. For me, I only see success on LinkedIn and that is after deleting and blocking many of my previous connections.

I have plenty to do and am grateful for all I have and all I lost because through it all, I connected with myself. I can finally be who I am. I got everything out I needed to get out. Do I live a perfect life? My goodness, no! I am better than I was, but now truly know who I am and what and who I want in my life.

Giving, not Getting

Having an antiquated education made me ineligible for positions, as did my anxiety and depression. I had worked 22 years straight and paid a huge chunk of taxes.

In 2018, I suffered several life changing events that would impact one’s mental health. I applied for benefits because after 800 job events logged (globally), I could not find a position. I was rejected, a theme in my life, which I have come to love, due to being educated.


I now see my 1st Amendment rights being scaled back and am always up for a challenge. Every setback and struggle are ingredients in success. I embrace every one of them and become more driven and determined.

Success is a strategy and it is your own responsibility. When people are not sorry to see you struggle, stay grateful because they only make you stronger.


To whom it may concern:

I have not been employed and have not had a real job since 2/16/18. In that time, I have accomplished more in eight months than I have in my entire life because I had time. YOU have to do the work on YOUrself. I am in survival mode. I am strong and I will be okay. I am so close. I know it.

With that being said, I will list what and who I am and am not:

  • Ann Landers - I apologize, but I am the last person to ask for advice in your personal life. Maybe when I get there, I can help you.

  • There is a traffic jam on the dark soul highway and I am not the cause.

  • I am not a New Moon Goddess. Courageously creep on your own.

  • Just because I do not have a real job does not mean I am available 24/7. I am not an ATM to be at your service. I only answer to myself.

  • I am not your SEO strategist unless you are paying me. You get my content on this website for free.

  • I am not your friend if I don’t want to be.

  • I will not help you if I don’t want to.

  • If you drain my energy, please go and take care of yourself. If you are feeling depressed, read my poetry.

I apologize if I sound cold and callous, but I had no one there for me. Only myself. Again, only YOU can change YOUrself.

Emotionally inEpt

Emotions are a feeling, for example, when someone's actions or words cause you pain

A judgment is a view you hold. Emotions can cloud judgment. A judgment is based on your morals and your belief system. I am an advocate of honesty, clear communication, and respect. It is acceptable to reject someone respectfully. That will cause them maybe some harm, but it won't have them judge you in a poor fashion. When you step up to the plate and portray honesty, you avoid hurting someone's feelings. When you're dishonest and closed off, you create your own judgment of how others view you.

You are your own judge and jury. Yet people will judge you and they have every right to if your actions do not align with your verbiage.

That is the way I define my metrics when holding an opinion of someone. I would rather look hopeless and honest than be covered in cowardice. 


Dedication, Inspiration, and Motivation

This website is dedicated to everyone out there who wants to make a radical change in their life.

I hope to be your inspiration in some simple shred.

It is my utmost motivation to prove that you can be who you want to be. Just because you are an adult doesn't mean you can no longer have dreams. You can pursue your passion at any age and I will be proof of this.

If you have ever felt that feeling deep down inside that you had a more powerful purpose than what you are doing in your life, then you do.

If you sense that you always thought you were destined to do greater things, there is still time.  

Today, I reached an accomplishment that proves that my intuition was correct. I always had feeling of what my destiny should be. It was always buried deep down inside of me because everyone said, "that will never happen" or "dream on" when I was younger.  I never stopped it, I just hid it, but always held onto it.

As I approach my 71st hour of publication on LinkedIn, a great article is defined to have 1,000 views in 72 hours. I am 71 hours in and have 1,635 views. There it is. The proof that you need to foster that fierce feeling inside and be the force you were born to be.  



When I was getting ready to start interviews, I went through 17 years of my career and reflected. I wanted to know what my reputation was. I asked everyone and anyone I could get in touch with that worked with me or for me. Some of these people, I was tough on and I wanted their input the most. I was overwhelmed by the positive remarks and how I am viewed. Their views actually align with the views of myself.

Here is a list of my 360 Feedback Assessment Project


An incredible person full of drive and creativity
Well organized, a good planner, time effectiveness, clear communicator, motivated, clear understanding of what motivates others, a leader, and flexible.
Well organized, dependable, dedicated, great team skills, someone who treats the business as if it was their own. Driven, but acceptable to changes.
Focused, organized, strong follow up and follow through, people person, leans on staff strength and guides them to overcome weakness. Listens to what is being said and what is not being said, takes time to help each member of the team. Strong communication skills, hard worker, dedicated to the job, and does whatever is needed to be done.
Ambitious, likes to get to work and accomplish tasks, confident in her work and product, conscientious, aware of surroundings, others’ performance, and the workload. Easy-going, easy to get along with, able to deliver a strong message, hard-working, and dedicated.
You are super talented with your expression through written words among other things. I think you found your true calling. Keep it, people are paying attention, in a positive way.
Conscientious, hard working, persistent, detailed, and consistent.
Working for Melissa was one of the best parts of being on the merchandising team. She made sure completing a project was top priority, but also took care of the team to accomplish the goal. One of the best project managers I ever worked for.
Hard working, committed, agreeable, steady, and happy.
Dedicated, focused on completion of tasks, able to gather a team and follow ip on progress to complete job in timely fashion. Great communicator and attention to details.
Structured, detail-oriented, efficient with time management, pro-active, organized, knowledgeable, hard-working, adaptable, accurate, dependable, focused, motivated, thorough, and committed
Positive, hard-working, passionate, natural leader, willing to help when needed, reliable, dependable, cares about the work she does and makes it a point to recognize her coworkers and encourage them. She is a great asset to any team.
Excelled at managing, organizing, and delegating multiple projects at a time, especially time sensitive ones. Very accommodating to staff, managed employees with efficiency and flexibility. Allowed opportunities for internal growth. Mediator to conflicts resulting in diffusing the conflict positively.
Outgoing, dependable, determined, self-starter, adaptable, innovative, problem-solver.
Knows what she likes and how she likes it. Perfectionist in detail. Total people person. Willing to broaden her knowledge to move further along and stand above the rest.
She pushes people to their full potential to get the best out of them.
Intelligent, great organizer, and dependable.
Very detail-oriented, good with keeping the timeline on a project, and can manage large groups effectively.
Determined, dependable, hug attention to detail, great team-building, technology-savvy, loyal, and goal-oriented.
Hard working, team player, motivated, committed. productive, knowledgeable, honest, and creative.
Direct and to the point. Easy to work with.
Leader, teacher (yet teachable), confident, loyal, reliable, approachable, takes initiative, ambitious, and personable.
Dedicated, committed to completing the task, someone who works tirelessly to get the job done, fun to work with, a problem solver, knowledgeable, resourceful, strong leader, and delegator.
Self-disciplined, methodical, upbeat, and resourceful.
Always seemed confident with everything.
Results-driven leader with outstanding team building capabilities, a straight shooter, and her focus on detail is like nothing I have seen in my life.
Natural leader, self-motivated, self-directed, able to easily give and take direction, able to see the ‘big picture’ in situations and do what needs to be done. Very astute, extremely personable, strong work ethic, able to consider alternative paths to achieving desired results, and can think ‘outside the box’”
Conscientious, assiduous, diligent, steadfast, resilient, innovative, and a collaborator.
Smart, funny, charming, sweet, yet fierce.
Just professional in the way the job is approached on a daily basis. The thing that stands out the most is the way associates are spoken to. Associates are always acknowledged when they do a good job and they are made to feel good about themselves. Communication skills are great, gets the point across, very knowledgeable, and will point errors out in a way that people do not feel bad when given feedback.
Freaking amazing, an asset to any company or organization, she is the sh*t!
Focused, driven, hard-working, conscientious, methodical in completing tasks, organized, motivated, a solid team builder and operator.
Loyal, trustworthy, hard-working, and fun-loving.
Reliable, trustworthy, committed, has integrity and professionalism.
Insightful leader, delivers outside the box ideas, and provides a wonderful work environment. Productivity is amplified when she’s in charge and her competency in the business world makes her vital to any team.
Leadership with knowledge and compassion, teaches with such kindness, has strength, and inspires me.
Detail-oriented, high energy, results-driven professional know that knows how to deal with f*****g a******s!
Always positive, treats everyone extremely well and is a hands-on corporate ‘Beacon of Light’. Her attention to detail as well as follow up is second to none. Always excellent to work for and with, she inspires her people to excel beyond expectations as we try to keep up with her great work ethic.
An asset to any corporation, great team player that one feels always a part of something no matter the size of the task at hand. Funny and charming also and ‘that light up the room smile’ is to die for.

Personality Provided-Wingfinder Assessment

This is from Red Bull's Wingfinder free assessment. I emailed them saying they need to hire me and they sent this back. I took it and they replied that they would try to match me up with something . I bombed the spacial recognition portion with patterns and stuff. I have never been strong suited for that numerical stuff and I know it 

I also disagree because they make it sound like I am this chatty Cathy, but, really I can be an extrovert or an introvert. It depends on what I am set out to do. I honestly can say this factor is incorrect.  

But this is interesting and free so you can always take it at : if you are looking to change up your career a little bit, this will point you in the right direction.

Have fun!




Being Sociable is a strength that helps Melissa build new relationships and maintain existing ones. Chances are she is happy in outward-facing roles which require a high level of interaction, and has built up a good network of contacts. Melissa is Innovative which means she is able to generate original ideas and apply them in useful ways. She is able to think differently and take the lead on how things should be done. Melissa is Supportive which means she has a strong desire to help and advance others. This is a great strength to have as it enables her to connect with those she is working with and work for the good of the team. Openness to Experience is a strength that helps Melissa appreciate novelty, diversity and innovation. It enables her to navigate complex and changing environments which helps Melissa adapt quickly to modern organisations.


Melissa's Creativity score measures how original and innovative her thinking is, or how logical and analytical it is. She is open-minded, enjoys novelty and change, and is often coming up with new and interesting ideas.

Thinking measures how abstractly or concretely Melissa prefers to think when solving problems. She prefers to be hands on and get stuck in. Melissa enjoys finding intuitive solutions to practical problems and believes learning comes from experience, not text-books. She applies her common-sense approach to even complex situations.

Melissa's Drive score measures her level of ambition. She is confident and always aims to do her very best work, but she doesn't see the people around her as rivals. So while Melissa enjoys being praised for her achievements, she is equally happy to see others being recognised for theirs.

The Connections score measures how Melissa manages relationships and how well she works independently. Melissa enjoys being at a stage in her career where she is helping other people, establishing connections and growing a network.




Meeting people comes naturally to Melissa. She is happy to be the centre of attention, even talking to groups of strangers. She succeeds through:

. her sociability
. building networks and relationships
. her enthusiasm

Melissa stands out for her original thinking. She prefers to avoid the obvious route when it comes to problem solving. She succeeds through:

. seeing things differently
. coming up with lots of original ideas
. finding new solutions

Melissa is good at thinking about other people before herself. She appreciates the support and ideas they can offer. She succeeds through:

. her selflessness and desire to help others
. her openness to other opinions . her focus on the group

Melissa enjoys daydreaming and thinks originally. Open-minded and comfortable with change, she adapts well to new situations. She succeeds through:

. her intuition
. her flexibility
. her sense of aesthetics






Thrive on meeting new people Enjoy coming up with innovative solutions Are naturally supportive of colleagues Leap enthusiastically into the unknown

May prefer not to work alone
Can feel constrained by too much routine Can be too influenced by others' needs Shy away from repetitive tasks


Power Pose

I would always be mindful of how I stood and tried to consciously change it. I couldn't. If I was at work and talking to the staff, I would have my legs spread a little bit and always have my hands on my hips giving space. I kept thinking that I need to change the stance because it is probably projecting poor non-verbal communication. This body language is probably unacceptable. I need to research it and work to fix it. I never had time and pushed it to the back of my mind. As I was taking a course on LinkedIn Learning, one of the first ones I was drawn to was body language.

I thought, "ok, I can find out what the stance means and how to actively correct it." Then, after watching one course, I learned that it is actually a power pose. Standing with my feet spread apart is a non-verbal communication of leadership presence. Westside Toastmasters also refers to the hands on the hips as a readiness gesture. The person is ready for assertive action.  

In my previous position, change and chaos were consistent. We always had to be ready for the unexpected. I had to deal with every personality type out there. I had to deal with mostly men so that is why I probably set my legs apart. I remember the one time, a sub-contractor kept walking past me and 15 minutes later, asked me, "Who is the person in charge?" I said, "Me, I know you were looking and expecting a man." Then he stumbled on his words and looked like an even bigger fool.  

So, I am not putting my power pose away. I will use my legs and my arms to clear the space around me and let them know, that I am ready and they can bring it on.